Princess Ganga Writes: July 2010

1. The most beautiful woman will always fall for:
a) the rogue
b) the penniless rogue(the kind that don't care about money)
c) the rogue who only needed her money
d) the rogue who married her because his parents said so
e) the rogue who needed the title she could give him
REALITY: Men always marry a woman only if he can get something from her in return(her money, her virginity, her influences or the joint tax rate) and I daresay in almost all cases he's not thinking about your heart or the love you could give him.

2. Even if your husband left you for his mistress straight after the marriage was consummated, you will still accept him because you remembered how good your first and only sex was.
REALITY: His mistress probably pilfered every penny in his pocket and now needed a wife to strengthen his influences in the Office. Taking on another mistress who happened to be a rich widow could be a solution but he needed to cut down on money. So, he went for the next best thing: his wife. Also, someone needs to wash the dishes. For free.

3. You would elope with him if he was 'devastatingly handsome'. Doesn't matter if he had no money, was barren, had STD or was -God Forbid- just pretending to love her just to have 'some fun'.
REALITY: He probably made a wager with his scoundrel friends that he could snag and ruin the most sought-after debutante of the season.

4. Men are so gay they pledge their love for the woman every 3 seconds.
REALITY: Need I explain this? This is never gonna happen. Not now, not in a million years. Once men said 'I Love You' to a woman he expects her to remember it. Saying it once was already cheesy enough.
'Darling, tell me you love me."
'Damn woman! How many times am I supposed to say this to you???' is a more likely answer.

5. When your pig of a husband left you for war leaving you with his monster parents you managed to have some sense of the reality of marriage. About a month of melancholy you finally get the courage to leave them and be independent, consequently taking on a lover who treats WAAAYYY better than your hub(and is sincere) you go back to your husband the second he asks you to because his kissed you a few times and your moist lady parts couldn't handle his virile being.
REALITY: During this era, if a woman refused her husbands wishes(especially his conjugal rights, she can be convicted of treachery and a paperwork will be issued to 'honor her husband's marital bed'.) So, you see, she actually didn't have a choice but the impact was made lighter by throwing in some romantic flare.

6. The heroine will be a prim and proper lady but have no troubles at all having sex in the carriage. The coachman was most likely holding the reins in one hand and jerking off in the other.
REALITY: All virgins are secretly insatiable porn stars, according to these books.

7. Referring to number six, the prim and proper debutante goes to the church everytime she has 'impure thoughts of a man' but have no trouble making out in the opera boxes, toilets and the drawing room of her house.
REALITY: Who don't like the thrill of being caught doing the boogie?

8. She makes the ultimate sacrifice by keeping her matrimonial vows whilst her husband is all but 'Okay, cool."
REALITY: She suffered permanent head damage and is now fancies herself the righteous wife. Any woman in her right mind would have cut off his balls with a chainsaw the minute he ill-treat her. SLOWLY.

9. On his physical appearances, here are some ridiculous facts.
a) He is always tall. Like 6" to 6"5 tall.
REALITY: Men from this era are usually no taller than 5"6.
b) He is always muscular because despite being a nobleman he enjoys hard labor. Like a slave.
REALITY: Men from this era never lift a finger to work. There's always someone to do things for him. His toileting, his dressing, his paperworks. I'm surprised they didn't have servants for feeding the lords. Perhaps some of them have. Anyway, there were more fat people than thin people those days. Looking our generation now, do you think it's some sort of compensation?
c) His smile always melt a woman into butter.
REALITY: He has some helluva an ugly set of teeth.
d) He's always a good singer.
REALITY: Seriously, what the fcuk?
e) In rare cases, he can cook and embroider.
REALITY: Leave a man in the kitchen it would look like a planet from another world. Leave a needle in a man's hand and he'll poke his eyes out. Trust me I have seen.
f) Despite him being a high-class himbo, he's ironically very educated and philosophical.
REALITY: Between the time he used to woo women into spreading their legs and gallivanting off to pubs with his best buddies, he managed to catch up on some reading. Superman is NOTHING compared to this guy it seems.

10) On her ridiculous appearance, wait till you hear this:
a) She is most of the time, a blonde.
REALITY: Living up to the myth about blondes being stupid, men wants blondes purely because she is stupid enough to believe his shit. Because a woman with intelligence will always beat the crap out of him and it's too much for men to handle. Needless to say an easy way out would be to marry a bimbo. She's happy to snag the hottest bachelor in town, he's happy to have double the green he usually has in his bank account. All's well that ends well.
b) She comes from a wealthy family.
REALITY: Of course, nothing is more attractive to a man than a woman who can put some green in your account.
c) She is almost always the most beautiful woman.
REALITY: This is very depressing for women out there who are less than average. It's like saying only beautiful women find true love in the end and live happily ever after. Ladies, only men with rare intelligence will look for women beyond her beauty.
d) Sometimes, she is this strong woman with an iron will but with the slightest hint of flirtation she becomes a desperate ninny.
REALITY: This a man's fantasy for the most part. They feel 'like a man' when they managed to bring down the toughest of the women to their knees. In truth, any unwanted sexual advances made unto this kind of women will usually result in severe damages on the men(think a kick in the balls).

This pics are a tribute to South Indian actresses from the 1940's to 1950's. This is a respect to Indian actresses who actually had REAL acting talents and meaningful roles for their works unlike contemporary Indian actresses whose acting credibility are highly questionable. SALUTE TO THESE WOMEN. I still prefer these vintage actresses from the likes of Asin, Tamanna and whatever else crap Kollywood nowadays introduce as 'actresses'.

Padmini. The highest paid, most beautiful, most sought after and most popular South Indian actress of all time. She has passed away about 4 years ago. A true legend.