Jealousy and envy are nothing more than misplaced admiration. It is the degree to which they're executed that matters. By talking about envy and jealousy, I am also going to link this to the relevance of bullying.
I, a noob uncertified psychologist have come up with my own categorization of bullying.
1. Harmless
a) No involvement between perpetrator and victim
b) Perpetrator just watches from afar, thoughts preoccupied about victim.
2. Borderline
a) Significant involvement.
b) Perpetrator influences victim, actions have impact on victim.
3. Severe
a) Extreme involvement
b) Perpetrator actively engages in activities that effects victim severely on both physiologically and psychologically. This may be murder, torture, rape etc.
My own experience as a bully victim have thought me much. It allowed me to have introspection and see from a neutral vantage point that sees from the perspectives of both the victim(you and I) and the perpetrator. Let me bring to light what I have realized, which should have happened long ago.
The thing about bullies is they're extremely insecure of themselves. Their targets/victims are usually of people whom they regard as "above" them and possess characteristics that perpetrators want for themselves.
It is this frustration on unobtaining the desired characteristics for themselves that prompts them to resort to underhanded methods we all know as bullying.
I am in the opinion that if you are bullied, you should be flattered. Yes, as incredulous as it sounds: I am absolutely certain of my claim. You possess a quality that your bully longs to have. There is something good in you that your bully wants but is unable to achieve.
BE PROUD OF IT.
Having said that, this is no way a shout out to endure your pain. No. I would like to take the opportunity to empower those who are being bullied to stand up, speak up. SHOUT! if you must so your bully know you mean business. Tackle the harrassment as long as you can endure. When you feel that you have reched your limit of enduring it, I strongly suggest that you involve an adult to settle things in a more effective way. An adult would act as a mediator who listens to both sides of the stories and come to a decision on how to effectively solve the drift between you and your bully. Ask your bully of the motive he/she is doing this.
Hear them out. For all we know, the root of this evil is nothing more than a misunderstanding. If the bully is doing it because of spite and unwarranted sadism, no one would blame you for being upset with them.
If the case is serious ie your bully have gone physical on you than rest assured you are in good hands of people who would support you, ensuring your bully get his appropriate punishment.
Please don't be afraid to speak up. You do not have to endure such things for happiness is what you deserve.
If you're teenager, even if you're a 19 years old, it helps to tell someone of your misfortune. An adult confidant can be anyone - a trusted teacher, best friend, lover, family, relatives, school counsellor, anyone you feel closest with.
If you are a shy person like me, email jo@samaritans.org. These are good online counsellors - free service - who provide professional help. You have the privilege of being anonymous and have a neutral third party give helpful suggestions as per your case. Talk with them first, see what they have got to say about handling your bully case and from there pick up on.
Remember, a dog would only keep barking until you tell him to shut up.
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